Sunday, January 15, 2012

My mum is going to die soon of cancer, do I as her son send flowers at her funeral ? and who do I address them

NO ,You give her the flowers now so she can enjoy them,(quit thinking of yourself)
My mum is going to die soon of cancer, do I as her son send flowers at her funeral ? and who do I address them
Usually the child of the deseased has a bouquet at the top of the casket with a ribbon that says Mom on it...you just have them sent to the funeral home and they set it up...I'm so sorry about your mom..My prayers are with you
Reply:I'm so sorry about your Mom. Your Dad, sisters, and brothers can get together and have the florist make a "blanket" to put on her casket. Other than that you don't send flowers. If you are the onl;y living relative , than just you would have the "blanket" made.
Reply:I'm sorry about your mother. I just lost my mom to cancer two weeks ago, so I do know what you're going through. As for the flowers, the family, whether it's just you or you and siblings, etc. provide a casket spray that drapes across the top of the casket (with a ribbon that says Mom or whatever you want, or without - we chose without because it made it look too much like a homecoming mum). If someone else will be doing the casket spray, then you can do a funeral spray (that will be on a stand next to the casket). You don't really address them to anyone, just go to the flower shop and give them the information about when and where the funeral will be and tell them that you're her child. Until then, spend as much time as you can with her and don't let anyone tell you that you're spending too much.
Reply:As a son you don't have to send anything. You have to be home.
Reply:Why do you care about political correctness of sending or not sending flowers when your mother's days may be numbered????



Stay by her side every minute you can and never let her forget that you love her.



Good Luck
Reply:I'm so sorry you are going through this, it is a hard thing to have to face.



Sometimes paying attention to the small details can help take our mind off the pain of the circumstances, and I know this is what you are doing.



Usually, the funeral directors or arrangers will ask if you would like to have flowers on the coffin, and you can state your wishes at that time. There are some lovely arrangements to choose from, and you will be able to select something that really represents your mother's personality and spirit.



It is sometimes difficult to make these arrangements beforehand, which is why it is so helpful that the funeral people can help do this.



If you prefer, why not go along to your favourite florist, explain the situation and ask that something very individual be prepared. You could pay for it now, and then when the time comes, all will be ready without fuss.



As for whether or not it is appropriate ~ it is if that is your wish (or your mother's).



Sometimes people do choose not to have flowers, preferring instread that those attending the funeral make a donation to a favourite charity (for example, cancer research), but flowers remain popular and it is quite in order to send them yourself, or on behalf of other family members (such as children) whoi cannot make the arranegments themselves.



Flowers are a wonderful visual reminder of the colour and spirit that was the person we have lost, and their beautiful display also reminds us that death is part of the great cycle of life.



I hope this next time passes without pain for your mother, and that the funeral you are planning with such love is a time of comfort and support for you and your family.



Best wishes.
Reply:I'm sorry to hear about your mother. I realize you have many questions and fears of the unknown. This is not an easy time for anyone. If you are the only family she has most likely you will be handling all of the arrangements. When the time comes to talk with the funeral director, these decisions will be made. They will ask you about burial (you may want to find out if your mother wishes to be cremated) They will ask about flowers, guest numbers and the type of service you want. I don't know if you live near you mother or not but if you can, spend as much time as possible. You may find that if she is able to do so, she will instruct you on her wishes. LISTEN to her. There is a certain calming feeling knowing that you have taken care of everything before you go. She actually may already have made the arrangements or have a policy that will take care of things. You may need to find this out. If there are other family members discuss this with them. As far as the flowers go, no you do not SEND flowers, they are part of the funeral arrangements when it comes to the immediate family. These things can be handled before hand, you may want to look into that. That way, you don't have to try to think when you are greiving. Again, I am sorry.
White Teeth

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